Let's Celebrate our Decline!
A wacky friend had a serious proposition at a dinner party last night. (Better than serious friends who make wacky propositions...)
Already a proponent of offroad bowling, this friend, an *abnormally* perceptive emergency room physician, said that our species has long celebrated birthdays and the development of special skills, like how happy we get when our kids first learn to walk. He said we should likewise celebrate as we gradually lose our skills and faculties. (After all, we sometimes celebrate our deaths, at wakes.) This gave us good cause for numerous toasts throughout the evening as evidence was displayed of our various milestones of decline. Causes for celebration could include: loss of fitness, vision, hearing, sanity, ability to walk, continence. Look on the bright side! ("That's it! He's doing it! He stumbled, can't get up, can't walk. Yes, he's CRAWLING! Three cheers!")